It was a bit of a trick question (given my years of experience in the psychology field and some things I’ve been wondering about lately), but I posted this on Facebook the other night anyway.
“I’m just curious.. What is the longest time you’ve grieved for a pet? & What amount of time do you feel is appropriate to grieve for a pet? This is a very personal topic and there is no right or wrong answer.”
I noticed some trends in the comments received, so I decided to consult with a couple of expert friends on the subject.
Several people thought since my Ozzy had just passed that I was asking for advice for myself. So they consoled me. Super sweet. But that wasn’t the reason for the post.
I picked up Ozzy’s ashes that afternoon and felt a very peaceful love for him and from him. I didn’t break down or cry like I was concerned about for the past week while I procrastinated on retrieving his remains. I suppose most of my grieving was done in private while he was still alive with cancer.
The first person I spoke to about the post was Kira Ellis of Intuitive Pet Care. She is an animal soul translator. Best I can describe it is she helps people understand the connection between their lives and the missions of their pets. When I told her about the condolence responses she said,
“What they are telling you is what they need to hear for themselves, so they are really speaking to themselves in your eyes.”
I loved that. If the questions I asked brought healing on any level to my friends still grieving their pets who have passed on, I’m all about that.
Some very powerful things Kira had to say about losing our pets:
The death of a single animal has the power to generate a thousand human blessings.
When an animal crosses over they set SO many blessings in MOTION — blessings we aren't always ready for or know how to receive. We rarely see the blessings because of all the pain:
What we don't see are the 50 comments filled with love and support on the post we made about their death.
What we don't see is the newfound motivation we now have to leave a dead end job or relationship.
What we don't see are all of the missed calls from people who cared.
What we don't see are the years of built up emotions now pouring out of us because we lost the closest thing to our hearts.
We aren't always ready for them to leave because deep down we know that if they leave things will change. Our comfort zones will shift and more things will come, more things will go. The timing never feels right because they provide an incredible amount of safety for us. When they leave it’s the equivalent of a blankey being taken away from a small child.
Losing an animal is incredibly painful because they SEE us. They see our hearts like no one else. Being seen by them is a gift in and of itself that we feel cannot be experienced outside of them. What they want us to know is that we CAN experience love like theirs, but in order for this to happen room must be made. This is why they leave. To release us to the world to experience a greater kind of love that they will now be guiding us to from the other side.
THIS is their greatest wish for us.
To Be Continued..
